Episode 11

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Published on:

9th Sep 2026

#11 Chronic Illness Grief: The Pain & Losses No One Told You to Expect

A conversation on MS, grief, caregiving, and trusting God with the threads you can't see

💛 Episode Summary:

What do you do when your dreams for your life get rewritten — more than once? In this episode, I'm joined by my friend Brooke Bendell Stark, a writer living with multiple sclerosis, who opens up about the invisible losses of chronic illness and the picture that has carried her through it all — God as the Master Weaver, seated at the loom, turning our frayed threads and broken dreams into something beautiful we often can't see from our side of the tapestry. This is an honest, tender conversation about grief, chronic illness, and holding onto faith when nothing goes the way you planned.

In this conversation, we talk about:

- What it's really like to live with MS — the unpredictable symptoms, the loss of control, and learning to plan "in the moment" instead of far ahead

- The invisible losses that come with chronic illness — grieving plans, energy, and even small things like a note you meant to handwrite

- Trusting God as the Master Weaver — handing Him the broken threads and resting in the tapestry He's making, even when you can't see the pattern

⏱️ Episode Timestamps:

0:00 — Cold open: what do you do when suffering comes in layers?

1:28 — Welcome to Joy in Suffering + introducing Brooke

2:41 — Brooke on their shared bond of Christ and chronic illness

3:19 — Brooke's story: six kids, foster care and adoption, her creative background

3:58 — The three types of MS, explained

5:30 — The "Master Weaver" metaphor: God at the loom

8:05 — What living with MS has looked like day to day

8:19 — The diagnosis that changed their mission field plans

11:04 — Learning to rest in Him instead of planning ahead

13:53 — Letting go of the illusion of control

14:44 — Surrender and stewarding her body well

17:06 — Trusting God's presence even when the day doesn't change

19:37 — The invisible losses of chronic illness

20:03 — Serving alongside her husband, and adjusting to physical limits

22:39 — Grieving the "small" losses no one else would notice

24:08 — Surrendering those losses and seeing what really matters

24:30 — Wrap-up + what's coming in Part 2

📖 Scripture:

Proverbs 3:5-6 (NIV) — "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight."

✨ Word of the Week: Surrender

Brooke's own word from this episode: "It's a surrender, yes. And we mistakenly battle the Lord with this — continually." Surrender isn't giving up. It's handing the threads you can't control to the One who can see the whole tapestry.

💭 Reflection Question:

Where are you still gripping tightly to something you were never meant to control? What would it look like to surrender that thread today?

💛 Signature Truth:

Your story isn't over.

God can bring purpose to your pain

And somehow- even here- joy still remains.

Mentioned in this episode:

A Quick Favor

"I'm looking for 3-5 women to hop on a short, no-pressure 15-minute call with me, just to hear a little about your journey with chronic illness, grief, or a hard season, and the words you would use to describe it. No catches, no upsells, just me wanting to understand my listeners better so I can serve you well. As a thank-you, I will send you my free faith quiz, "What Is God Growing in Your Life Right Now?" If you're willing, just send me a DM on Instagram and I will set up a time that works for you."

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About the Podcast

Joy in Suffering
A Christian Podcast for women navigating chronic illness, grief and hard seasons
Are you a Christian woman living with chronic illness, chronic pain, or deep grief — wondering where God is in the middle of your suffering?
Welcome to Joy in Suffering: a Christian podcast for women navigating chronic illness, grief, anxiety, stress, and the quiet heartbreak of lost dreams.
Hosted by Melissa Winters, who has lived with chronic illness since she was one year old, this podcast offers gentle, faith-filled conversations rooted in honest stories, Scripture, song, and hope that actually sustains you through the hard places.
Each episode creates space to wrestle honestly with suffering while remembering that God is present, loving, and still working — through stories, Scripture, and song.
Whether you're navigating chronic illness, walking through grief, struggling with anxiety and fear, grieving the life you thought you'd have, or simply exhausted from a season that won't let up — you'll find honest conversations, compassionate encouragement, and biblical hope designed to help you discover that joy is not the absence of pain. It is the presence of Christ within it.
What you'll find here:
1) Faith and hope for Christian women with chronic illness and chronic pain
2) Biblical encouragement for grief, loss, and hard seasons
3) Honest conversations about suffering, doubt, and holding onto God
4) Scripture-centered hope for anxiety, fear, and uncertainty
Stories of real women finding joy and purpose in the middle of limitations
5) Gentle encouragement for women who feel unseen, forgotten, or alone
If you've ever asked:
-Why does God feel so distant in my suffering?
-How do I find joy when nothing in my life is changing?
-Is it okay to struggle and still call myself a woman of faith?
-How do I hold onto hope when healing hasn't come?
-Does my life still have purpose even with chronic illness or grief?
You're in the right place.
This podcast is for Christian women who are tired of pretending they're okay — women who want real, Scripture-rooted encouragement that meets them right where they are, not after the storm passes.
New episodes drop every other Wednesday. Follow the show so you never miss an episode, and join Melissa on Instagram and Facebook at @melissawinters1974 for encouragement between episodes.
Your story isn’t over
Christ can bring purpose to your pain
and even here-Joy still remains

About your host

Profile picture for Melissa Winters

Melissa Winters

Melissa Winters is the creator and host of Joy in Suffering, a Christian podcast that encourages women navigating chronic illness, grief, and life’s hardest seasons. Having lived with chronic illness her entire life, Melissa understands the deep losses, questions, and unexpected detours suffering can bring. Through honest conversations, Scripture, and song, she points women to the unchanging hope found in Jesus Christ. Her prayer is that every woman who listens leaves feeling encouraged, strengthened in her faith, and reminded that Christ is with her—even in the hardest places.